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Riding my bike down the Pinellas Trail one bright Saturday morning, I saw a sign:
“Everyone has a story to tell. We'll help you tell yours! Toastmasters”
When I got home, I looked it up. They had meetings five minutes from my place—on Tuesday evenings.
That Tuesday, I went.
At the meeting, I watched two people give speeches. Two others gave them verbal evaluations. And everyone else—including me—wrote feedback on small sheets of paper called “Love Notes.”
Post-Toasties
As the meeting wrapped up, they asked visitors, including me, to share our thoughts. I told them I loved it.
Then the president mentioned that after each meeting, everyone was invited to “Post-Toasties”—a drink and a bite to eat.
That’s all I needed to hear. I was in!
Looking for more friends, this sounded terrific. And honestly, my public speaking could use some attention.
Just One Thing
I gave my second speech recently.
I worked hard on it. I wrote it, practiced it, re-wrote it and even created a little jingle: “All about grace, no ego” to the tune of “All About the Bass.”
I added a few “laugh tracks” to lighten it up.
When I delivered the speech, I thought it was going well.
Then I hit my first laugh line.
No one laughed.
I kept going.
I used the stage. Made gestures. Scanned the room for eye contact. Smiled.
Second laugh line… nothing.
Third… still nothing.
When I finished, everyone smiled and clapped enthusiastically. It felt good.
Later that night, I sat down to read my Love Notes.
And that’s when I started to laugh.
The Gift
My kind Toastmasters peers, one after another, praised my stage presence, eye contact, and gestures.
And then a theme emerged:
“I couldn’t hear you.”
“Work on speaking louder—I missed part of your speech.”
“It was hard to hear you.”
I learned a long time ago that feedback is a gift.
And I’m so grateful I got this one.
Because the best part?
I can fix it.
Leaders,
Show people that feedback is okay
Tell your own stories. Especially the ones where something didn’t go quite right. That’s how people learn it’s safe to try and safe to improve.
Keep feedback simple and human
It doesn’t have to be formal. A quick note. A comment after a meeting. One small suggestion. That’s often what people remember and use.
Give people a place to practice
Most growth happens in the reps. Not in the big moments. Encourage your team to try things where the stakes are low and the learning is high. For me right now, that’s Toastmasters.
Remind people that it can feel awkward
Trying something new isn’t smooth at first. That doesn’t mean it’s not working. It usually means you’re right where you need to be.
And one more thing…
If no one laughs the first time, keep going.
Just make sure they can hear you.
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Colleen
Postscripts
• Join me at one of more of my How Wrigley Field Made Me a Better Networker ⚾ workshops. I offer then twice a year as free public workshops through Career Transition Center. They are happening now - 1 hour webinars.
• Here's Heading West, my latest blog from Favorites: those photos that you keep that have a story to tell.
