Kimberly R. was the kind of employee who showed up early and stayed late.
She was type A, career-focused, gung-ho about her job. When her boss Scott arrived each morning — strolling in around 9:30 with his Starbucks — she was already waiting. Ready to talk through everything she'd been working on since 7 a.m.
Scott was cold. Her word, not mine. But she also says he was really pretty awesome.
One morning Kimberly knocked on his office door. He told her to come in. She sat down and said she had so many things to talk to him about.
He looked at her and asked one question.
"How many?"
She counted up her items. Ten.
"Narrow that down to two," he said. "Then come back and talk to me."
That was it. No lecture. No explanation. Just the redirect.
What struck Kimberly — and what stayed with her — is what happened next. She went back to her desk and started sorting through her list. And she realized she could figure most of it out herself. She didn't need Scott for eight of those ten things.
She just hadn't stopped long enough to try.
"I'm so glad that I worked for him," she told me. "He helped me grow. That job gave me the building blocks of my visual merchandising career."
Here's what I noticed about Scott. He wasn't warm in the traditional sense. He closed his door. He didn't linger. But he gave Kimberly something she didn't know she needed — the push to trust herself.
That's a version of demanding that doesn't look like demanding. It looks like two words and a number.
Narrow that down to two.
Some of the best coaching I've ever seen doesn't come with a long explanation. It comes with a short, clear expectation — and then space for the person to rise to it.
Leaders,
Think about how your team members come to you right now.
Do they bring you ten things when they could solve eight themselves?
Try this: the next time someone comes to you with a long list, ask them to prioritize before you engage.
"What are the two things you most need from me today?"
You might be surprised what they figure out on their own.
That's not withholding. That's building confidence.
This story is excerpted from Get Gen Z Into the Game, Colleen McFarland's award-winning playbook for leaders who want to bring out the best in their youngest employees.
👉 Find out if you are a warm demander leader. Take the quiz.


