What this picture is
This is my grandma, Mary Ellen Long, surrounded by her five granddaughters (I'm one of them). We are celebrating the wedding of my brother Kevin and his wife Peggy. We are at John D. McGurks Irish Pub and Garden in the Soulard neighborhood in St. Louis, Missouri. We have just come from their wedding at the Basilica of St. Louis, King of France, right near the famous Gateway Arch.
I'm the granddaughter on of the left sporting a bridesmaid's dress. Next to me is my cousin Megan. She has one arm affectionately draped around me and the other around my sister Sheila. Next to Sheila is our cousin and Megan's sister, Mary Beth. Mary Beth has one arm on our grandma's shoulder and the other around our sister, Eileen. If Eileen were taller, I'd credit her for the rabbit ears over Mary Beth's head. Likely the credit goes to one of the grandsons who couldn't resist the opportunity to infuse some humor in this photo.
Later, we will eat, dance, and enjoy the celebration that brings two families and many friends together-the celebration of the public commitment made by Kevin and Peggy to spend their lives together as a married couple and of our commitment to support them.
Why I saved this picture
My brother Kevin was the first of our generation of cousins to get married. It was the best day. Everyone was there. Everyone was happy. What touches me most about this picture is what came before it. There was a decision made that my grandma would attend the wedding, even though she was wheelchair bound and living hundreds of miles from St. Louis.
I didn't witness this decision or hear about the options considered. But through my whole life, I watched my grandma, her daughters and her sons, including my dad, figure-out and address similar situations.
A question would be posed, debated and the result would be a decision about the right action needed. Then being the collaborative problem solvers they were, they would cooperate with each other and figure out a solution and do it. They made something others would think is hard look easy.
It's not so hard when we work together
Don't let fear and potential obstacles blind your vision and push you into deciding between what is right and what is easy.
Discipline yourself to clear your head of the anxious thoughts of obstacles you might face. Confer with others who share your values and will guide and support you to make the decision you know in your heart is right. Then after the decision is made, feel the peace that comes when you work together to consider options and land on the actions needed to make it happen. Then, feel the joy that comes when your efforts result in smiles all around.
Key Points
When people share values and collaborate, obstacles become solvable — working together turns what feels impossible into something achievable.
Strong leaders and families choose what’s right over what’s easy by clearing fear, inviting others into the decision, and taking action together.